Many vulnerable creatures take evasive actions. The butterfly flies in wacky fashion. Never a straight line like the ability of a crow. Crows don’t act vulnerable. They’re kinda bossy. Taking on all sorts of predators in an annoyance roll. They sound the alarm about snakes and cats. They can try to drive a hawk to distraction.
Some people are like crows. Nothing much phases them. But then there’s the butterflies. People who are desperate to not be eaten by something much bigger than they are. Sometimes they wind up eating themselves because they’re tired of evading the “predator”… that is mental illness.
Suicide is the mental equivalent of a terminal physical disease. It’s not a willful act to “commit” suicide. “Commit suicide” is a misnomer because it indicates that the victim was in control.
At that emotionally extreme point, the victim is not in control. The illness is in control. Suicide is the triumph of a disease just like a death from cancer. Only suicide symptoms can be hidden making it impossible to physically diagnose and track.
The suicidal victim is overwhelmed with terrible and excruciating mental pain and sees no other apparent means of relief. Suicide is not a rational act.
Sometimes God intervenes. Sometimes He just opens His arms.
Victims of suicide include all the people surrounding someone with the disease. The survivors “guilt” believes that they could have done something to prevent it or even that they contributed in some way. But suicide is the internalized victory of a deadly illness.
The surrounding loving ones fall prey to their own mental illness in a state of depression and anxiety. This depression can last a lifetime because the grieving victim feels emptied and frustrated.
Probably the best medicine is talking. Losing a loved one to suicide is devastating. The suicide victim’s loving ones need help. There’s comfort in sharing with others. There’s comfort and hope in supportive human contact.
Dial 911 emergency services if you’re planning suicide.
Make calling 911 your first step.
As for me, I dance like a butterfly… and sing like a crow.
The demon I deal with is mental health. Occasionally, the demon tries to take over. I start suicidal thoughts. So I find a “quiet” place in my head. Writing this note helps or listening to a birdsong on my porch. I take medications for bipolar disorder which help keep me stable. I find peace when I’m able to focus outside my own head on others. I think God built me that way for a good purpose. ❤️
Portal/Testament page 33
Previous Bipolar / Next AllSpark
Back to Words Catalog
Back to Home
Suicide dedicated to my brother Joe
