Suicide is the mental equivalent of a terminal physical disease. It’s not a willful act to “commit” suicide. “Commit suicide” is a misnomer because it indicates that the victim was in control. 

At that emotionally extreme point, the victim is not in control. The illness is in control. Suicide is the triumph of a disease just like a death from cancer. Only suicide symptoms can be hidden making it impossible to physically diagnose and track.

The suicidal victim is overwhelmed with terrible and excruciating mental pain and sees no other apparent means of relief. Suicide is not a rational act. 

Speaking from my own experience, if someone is able to tell you that they are having suicidal thoughts, they’re likely able to receive help. Persons that are at the most risk, are those who keep their mental pain to themselves.

Victims of suicide include all the people surrounding someone with the mental disease. The survivors “guilt” believes that they could have done something to prevent it or even that they contributed in some way. But suicide is the internalized victory of a deadly illness. 

The surrounding loving ones fall prey to their own mental illness in a state of depression and anxiety. This depression can last for a lifetime because the grieving victim can feel emptied and frustrated.

Probably the best medicine for suicide is talking. Losing a loved one to suicide is devastating. The suicide victim’s loving ones need help. There’s comfort in sharing with others. There’s comfort and hope in caring human contact.

If someone tells you they’re thinking about suicide. Contact the authorities. There’s an indication that help is possible if someone is expressing suicidal thoughts.

Writing has been very therapeutic for me. But recognizing my own limits, I’m considering looking outside myself for even more professional help. Currently, I see my behavioral health supervising nurse regularly, and she keeps me aligned to earth. I’m simply wondering if a mental health therapist might do me some good. Is it possible to stop bipolar suicidal thoughts? I will never act on them, because I love my own family and know how much they love me. My own mental illness is manageable. My suicidal thoughts are intrusive, not obtrusive. But I think that I could be so much better if I could just fix what’s causing the suicidal thinking.

Dial 911 emergency services if you’re planning suicide.
Help yourself for a change.
Make calling 911 your first step.

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By Ed Caldwell

I was once tired, now I’m REtired… Except for some unavoidable honey-dos, I pretty much goof off for a living now. My last career job was designing internet operating circuit boards along with a distinguished team of engineers, managers and support personnel. Prior to that I was an electronics technician evolving into circuit board design in the defense industry working with tactical missile systems. My first career job was a professional artist. During my younger years I worked many odd jobs beginning at age nine with a newspaper delivery route.


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